when i was in india, it was so easy to get back to the hotel after a long day of adventure, boot up my trusty macbook pro, and fill the blank white page with tons of tiny black pixels. one blog per day. easy.

add in one person whom you like to snuggle, and boom! your writing time turns to story time instead. stories told in the present and not regurgitated onto the internet for y’all.

this is the part of this post where i will type my sincerest apologies. life has been go go go. and then santa went ho ho ho. and then a cyclone went blow blow blow. and then…insert something that continues to rhyme and represents new year’s day. i can’t think of one.

anyways, life has settled back into routine. and routine for me means i’m back at the wordsmithing. crafting something that will allow you to see this crazy world i’m living in.

this crazy world known as australia.

this crazy journey across australia.

where did i leave off? somewhere on the road in the middle of nowhere i’m sure.

on the road. it’s a common theme in photos and videos and stories and paintings and everything. there are whole movies that center their plot around a road trip. take for instance one of my favorites, tommy boy (which i just made ryan watch for the first time ever). we would never get the kind of memories we get from being on the road anywhere else.

and being on the road in the outback makes for some very interesting memories. i’m going to provide the cliff notes since i am about three weeks past due on this report.

highlights from hours and hours on the bitumen before reaching darwin (in addition to all the things already discussed in my previous blog posts):

• watching ryan cautiously build up enough courage to pass road trains. it’s a good thing i was not driving because i’m pretty sure i would just sit behind the massively long semitrucks forever.

• catching a glimpse of a rainbow after an unexpected momentary downpour. then soaking in the rain-revived colors of australia’s vast landscape.

• spending two or more days tapping into my inner exterminator after discovering a shit ton of ants had created a nest under the floor mat on my side of the car. yes, there was some screaming involved upon initial discovery.

• coming across a giant “knonosauras” in the middle of nowhere aka richmond, queensland and watching ryan fearlessly pry his jaws open.

• driving through what is known as one hottest towns in all of australia, conclurry. it holds the record for highest temperature. somewhere around 127° F. yuck. (however, upon further google analysis, we discovered that this record has been debated due to faulty weather instruments. it may have only been 117° F…)

• stopping in mt. iser and buying two pairs of completely necessary shorts and matching loose tanktops. oh, and a pair of completely necessary short overalls. all from kmart. and then we had to pay a dollar to use the toilet. and then i bought a converter. game on moving truck office.

• super hot and sticky nights crammed together in a single swag under the big beautiful starry sky with mosquitoes trying to bite every inch of my juicy skin, wallabies staring at me in the darkness, bats screeching annoyingly loud, and hundreds of cane toads nearly escaping death by rainbow sandals on a regular basis. (but were not dumped at this fine toad depository.)

• literally highfiving every time we turned a corner. (it was few and far between.)

• taking inspiration from tyson and creating our own “35 things to do before 35” lists. they are now hanging up on our closet door. mine will be published shorty. i know you’re all itching to see what the next eight years of my life has in store.

• trying to see things in the termite mounds and laughing every time i saw one with a shirt buttoned up around it. and being completely blown away by how a bunch of tiny insects can create structures so huge. they definitely know there’s no “i” in teamwork.

• one of the few quintessential touristy stops we made along the way: the daly waters pub. classic.

• slipping into the bitter springs thermal pools early in the morning with no one else around. calm waters reflecting the jungle all around it. a refreshing start to a twelve hour day of driving.

• the smell of night jasmine pouring into our windows as we pulled into towns for the evening. mmmmm.

• paying WAY too much for fuel because there was only one service station probably every 600 km and nothing in between. let me translate the below. that’s about $8.00 per gallon!

• ryan unprompted saying sincerely, “i reckon boxing and ballet would be two of the hardest sports to train for.” he knows the words to say to win over this dancer’s heart…

and then we finally arrived back in society. welcome to darwin. the city of evolution?